Saturday, October 13, 2007

Week 6 Praemium Terribilis

Since Mergz is AWOL and there was plenty of suckiness to be celebrated from last week's games, I've taken it upon myself once again to give out the Suckies.

Cumberland Award named in honor of the Cumberland team that took a 220-0 thrashing at the hands of Georgia Tech in 1916, this award honors the team that took the soundest beating of national significance in the past week.

Week 6 Winner – Nebraska

41-6 loss to Mizzou. 'nuff said.

Ron Zook AwardFor the coach who is “always getting better," even if that betterment is not discernable to the rest of us.

Week 6 Winner – Bill Callahan (Again)

A repeat Zook Award winner, Callahan's Huskers improved last week by getting throttled by Mizzou 41-6.

Ron Powlus AwardGoes to the nationally anointed one and presumptive Heisman candidate that didn’t quite live up to his hype during the past week.

Week 6 Winner – Tim Tebow

Tebow was already considered a dark horse because of his underclassman status. He did himself no favors by passing for a pathetic 46.2% on national TV. A 4th quarter interception led to an LSU touchdown that gave LSU life in a game the Gators had been leading throughout.

Prairie View Awardgiven each week to the specific squad (offense, defense, special teams or otherwise) that distinguishes itself for pure, unadulterated suckiness. The award is named in honor of the Prairie View Panther team that lost a college football record 80 consecutive games during the 1990’s.

Week 6 Winner - New Mexico State's Offensive Line

The Aggie Offensive line managed to block for 19 rushing yards on 26 carries (0.73 yards per carry) in losing 58-0 to Boise State. The pass blocking was no better as the line also gave up 6 sacks for losses totaling 35 yards. Total passing yards in the game for New Mexico State: 108

The Blue AwardNamed after September 1, 2007, the date “everything changed”, this award commemorates the team that overcame enormous odds to their undying detriment, thus losing to a team that they ought to have easily handled.

Week 6 Winner – USC

Who else could it be? The much ballyhooed darling of the PAC 10 and the "best team in history" according to Stanford Coach Jim Harbaugh was beaten by...Stanford. This award might have to be renamed "The 'Fight On' Award" in honor of this unfathomable upset.

The Roy Riegels AwardNamed in memory of Cal Bear Roy “Wrong Way” Riegels who while playing in the 1929 Rose Bowl picked up a Georgia Tech fumble and ran for 65 yards – the wrong direction, costing his team the game. This award honors the college football player who committed a blunder of such enormity that it perhaps single-handedly cost his team the game.

Week 6 Winner – John David Booty

Booty's FOUR second-half interceptions sealed the deal for the Cardinal, including a "Pick Six" and the final play of the game.

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